Library Love
by likewhitesmoke
Summary: Summary: Agoraphobic librarian Edward Cullen lives as a hermit. In sweater vests, glasses, and bowties he shuffles around the library, keeping to himself while capturing the attention of graduate student, Bella Swan. She finds his blushes and awkward smiles endearing and decides to make the first move. How will shy Edward react to being the girl of his dream's valentine? *Complete*


**I know this is late, but I wrote this one-shot for Valentine's Day. I got caught up in my homework and had to put it off—truthfully, I should be doing homework right now but I decided to spend half the day working on this for you guys. I'm happy I did because I really love this story. I definitely think this is the cutest bit of fluff I have ever wrote. I hope you like it! **

**P.S.A: This work is unedited and not looked over by a beta. If that bothers you, just pass on the story. I've never really seen the big deal about it because I literally read fanfic every day and have seen plenty of errors and it has never once bothered me. If I don't like, I just don't read. I just wanted to warn you guys now before you get too deep into the story. Usually, I appreciate the feedback on my stories but since this is a oneshot I'm not going to go back and fix anything so you don't have to tell me. (I have midterms coming up this week and I honestly don't have time to fix anything). **

**Anyway, I just wanted to say, Happy Valentine's Day! I know it's late but I love all of you guys and you really mean a lot to me. I hope you like my library fairy tale. Please comment and let me know your favorite Valentine's Day memory. Mine is getting a one-pound Hershey's chocolate bar because chocolate is my favorite thing on this Earth. (Besides fanfic and writing haha). **

**Library Love**

**Summary: Agoraphobic librarian Edward Cullen lives as a hermit. In sweater vests, glasses, and bowties he shuffles around the library, keeping to himself while capturing the attention of graduate student, Bella Swan. She finds his blushes and awkward smiles endearing and decides to make the first move. How will shy Edward react to being the girl of his dream's valentine? **

Body curled over the study table, Edward choked on his breath. The sunbeams that streamed through the window only helped momentarily—reminding him that there was a world outside of this room. Outside of this library. He took a deep breath and then, finally, straightened his back and stepped away from the table, snatching its pile of books up. _Why am I like this? _he thought as he walked the books back to his cart. _Why can't I just be normal for once? Why can't I at least appear normal? _

Moments like these made him want to hide away behind a pile of books—the one thing that always gave him solace. Books were the best form of escapism. From an early age, they had been his one and only love. The characters were always there for him. The characters never judged him. They had held him up when his father walked out on him and his mother. They had made him laugh when his mother began to date and leave him for hours on end. Even now, they played a pivotal role in his life because now he was having a hard time. A "hard time" would be putting it rather mildly. Every second, he felt like he had to hide. Every social situation made him feel trapped. If he was being honest with himself, he would say he was afraid of everyone.

Fictional characters were something controlled and manipulated and life was chaotic. Reality could harm him. Safety could only be found in his daydreams. Sometimes, when he would put away books, he would become lost in his own fictional world. Characters would come and go out of no where and he always kicked himself for not writing his ideas down. He knew a creative mind shouldn't be squandered but he also knew that even if he wrote it all down—even if he dedicated years to writing the stories filtering through his head on paper—he would never publish a single thing. The thought of the world reading something so personal made him feel dizzy.

Just as dizzy as the girl posed a few tables away made him. He adverted his gaze. His skin was still slick from the nervous perspiration he had experienced earlier. Telling kids to be quiet was literally the worst part of his job. Not that he didn't want them to stop talking—hearing people talk openly in a library always annoyed him to no end—he just didn't want to have to confront them about it. Confronting someone meant speaking to someone and speaking to someone was another thing he didn't want to do.

With a sigh, he pushed the cart forward and moved back to his desk. The cart was old, creaking as it moved and earning the attention of the pretty brunette sitting in the corner. Her eyes rose from her book and she looked at the cart before bringing her attention to the handsome—albeit skittish—copper-hair man pushing it. She smiled quietly to herself as she looked at him. He dressed similarly to her grandfather. Her smile grew as she took in the librarian's thick-rimmed, tortoise shell glasses, brown sweater vest over a slightly wrinkled cream button up, and dark brown dress pants. Then, there were his shoes, which were perfectly polished and looked like something out of the 1950s. He seemed to be so anal about his looks—truly, she thought he seemed to be anal about absolutely everything. She couldn't dismiss the way he looked at her and the way he pretended not to. It was cute. _Really _cute.

Awkwardly, Edward continued to push the cart forward, shooting the brunette an apologetic smile regarding the loud sounds coming from the wheels. His eyes darted away from her as she smiled back. Until he reached the comfort of his desk, he could barely breathe. As he sat in front of his computer, he let go of the breath he was holding and felt his body melt. _I can't believe she looked at me like that. I wonder if she's still looking … _He wondered, but he didn't dare look. Instead, he pulled up some information for an event he was working on and lost himself in his work.

Periodically, people came to him searching for help and he found that no matter what he did, he couldn't get his mind off the brunette. Every time he thought of her, he would make up a story about her life in his head. She seemed to be in her mid-twenties and Edward imagined she was a graduate student or a professor, perhaps. She seemed to love books just as much as him—this was what intrigued him the most about her. Her face as she read was absolutely beautiful. She would become engrossed in the story and everything around her seemed to fade away. When she was really concentrating, she would bite down on her lip and her brows would furrow. Edward always thought this was cute and if they were close, he would have liked to have reached forward and smooth on the small wrinkles on her face with his finger.

Every time he imagined her, he would see her with a wealth of friends. She always radiated so much joy and seemed magnetic. _She's probably popular. Popular and well-liked by everyone … _While Edward wished he could talk more easily with people, he wasn't sure if he ever wanted any sort of popularity. _One friend might be good to have. Too many would be overwhelming. _

There were so many things he wanted to do and all of those things required some sort of friend. He was a board game enthusiast despite having no one to really play with. When he was young, his mom used to play games with him all of the time. His love for them bloomed there and stuck with him ever since. _I wonder if the pretty brunette likes board games, too. I bet she'd be good at them. I bet—_he stopped his inner-monologue, realizing how ridiculous it all was. He was pining after a girl and he didn't even know her name. Calling her "the brunette" in his head almost felt misogynistic._ Maybe one day I'll ask her her name … One day. Just not this one. _

"The language section is right this way. And what you're looking for … 495.61 … Here it is," Edward said as he took the book off of the shelf and handed it to the bored teenager to his right. "_A Guide to Reading and Writing Japanese: the 1,850 Basic Characters and Kana Syllabaries. _Does that look like the one your tutor assigned?"

The girl looked at him for a moment, unimpressed with seemingly everything, and shrugged. "Yeah, I guess so. I can't believe she wants me to read all of this."

Edward rocked back on his heels, not knowing what else to say. He wasn't good at small talk. Or any sort of talk for that matter.

"Did you need help with anything else?"

The girl shrugged again before tucking the book beneath her arm. "I guess not."

"Well, you know where to find me, then."

Awkwardly, Edward made his way back to his desk and breathed a sigh of relief as soon as he sat down. Again, he hid behind his computer as he continued to make his flyer. _It's really something putting a self-diagnosed agoraphobic in charge of community events … _Edward thought to himself as he tried to make the flyer look somewhat appealing. As he worked, a group of teens came bustling in as school let out down the street. Since the library was a few blocks away from a high school, it was always busy around this time of day. Three o'clock hit and Edward always wanted to go hide in the bathroom until their parents came to pick them up.

Today, like every day, he left his desk and went to the breakroom to make some tea. Earl Grey could always help improve his mood. _If only I could sneak away with my cup of Earl Grey and read … _He smiled at the thought as he bounced his teabag around in his drink. He could never wait the full three minutes for the tea to steep. He pulled the tea bag out and tossed it in the trash, taking a drink despite the heat as he made his way back to his desk.

He cringed at the loud sound of teenager's voices as made his way back to his chair. They were all huddled around a table a few feet away from his pretty brunette. _"My" pretty brunette_, he thought, cringing even more. _She's far from mine. I'm having delusions of grandeur and we've never even spoken. _As he watched the group of teenagers, he knew he would have to say something to them. Besides, Jasper in the media room, Edward was the only librarian on the floor. _Maybe I can go get him … He's better at this sort of thing. No, no. I need to do this myself. Maybe if they'll quiet down when they settle in … maybe I should just give it a few minutes. _

Almost ashamed at his shyness, Edward went back and hid behind his desk, hoping they would quiet on their own. He shot them a few glances here and there, hoping they would make eye contact with him and realize they needed to shut up. It was to no avail, though. Edward shifted in his computer chair, taking a long drink of his tea as he tried to give himself a pep talk. His eyes wandered over to the brunette who was still reading her book and taking some notes on a pad of paper in front of her. She seemed annoyed, constantly shooting glances at the teens from where she sat. Eventually, her gaze moved to Edward and he choked on his breath. Her eyes screamed, "shouldn't you be doing something about this?" Instead, of getting up and answering her plea, Edward sat frozen in his seat.

She shot the teens another annoyed glance before standing and abandoning her things on her desk as she traversed across the room. Edward's eyes widened and he dropped his gaze down to his computer, feeling blood rush to his face. _She's coming over here. She's coming over here! SHE'S COMING OVER HERE! _his mind screamed as his heart pumped so quickly that he could barely hear his own thoughts. _Stay calm and play it cool. I've got to play it cool. She's going to think I'm such a loser. _His mind was still racing as she stopped right in front of his desk.

"Hey, can I bother you for a second?"

Slowly, he raised his gaze to meet hers, hiding behind his tortoise shell glasses. He pushed the glasses up to rest higher on his nose and met her gaze. He smiled—or at least tried to; he was sure he looked uneasy—and nodded.

"Those kids won't stop talking and I'm trying to finish reading my book for class. I just really need to focus and I'd like it if you would tell them to stop."

_She doesn't know what she's asking … _Edward knew he was being ridiculous—this was part of his job, after all. If he couldn't handle something like this, he needed to find out how he could do something working from home. _That'd be depressing. I'm already alone enough as it is … _It was strange, loving people while hating to be around them. He didn't particularly _like _being alone but for him, it seemed like the only way he could live. He couldn't stomach people as much as he wanted to one day interact with them.

"I—I can go tell them," he stuttered out, finding it harder to talk to pretty women. "Sorry a—about that. I—I really should have gone over there s—sooner."

The brunette eyed him for a moment before her shoulders relaxed. "It's fine. I just didn't want to be the one … Well, things always get awkward for me after I speak up."

"It's okay. I should be the one to do it."

With another awkward smile, he stood up and walked past her, moving toward the table to teens. It was something that shouldn't be scary, but it made his heart race. He hated confrontation—hated it even more when he knew the people he was confronting wouldn't give a single shit what he thought. He reached their table and stood for a moment as he waited for them to notice him. They didn't. He took a deep breath and puffed out his chest, feeling ridiculous as he began to speak.

"Sorry … I'm going to have to ask you guys to quiet down." He stood there, waiting for a response but the whole time he was speaking, he didn't get a single kid's attention. Edward coughed and paused for them to have some sort of response. "Guys …" Nothing. He reached forward and tapped one of the kids on the shoulder. Begrudgingly, the kid turned in looked at him.

"Did you say something?"

Edward shifted on his feet, trying his best not to look too uncomfortable as he repeated himself. "I'm going to need you guys to quiet down. This is a library and there are people here trying to study."

The kid smiled before his eyes darted around the room, finding it basically empty. "There's like no one here right now. Why does it matter?"

"It matters. There are signs everywhere." Edward pointed at one of the "quiet, please" signs to emphasize his point. "If you want to rent a study room, all I need is your school ID card."

"We're cool sitting here. We're already all set up."

Edward peered down at their binders and notebooks. "I can help you move your stuff if you—"

"No need," another one of the kids chimed in. "We're not moving so you don't have to help us."

"We'll try to be more quiet," the first kid said with an eye roll. "You don't have to be such a—"

"We'll be quiet, sir," one of the girls chimed in as she shot the boy a look.

Edward, not really satisfied with the interaction, back away anyway. He didn't spare them another look as he made his way back to his desk. The beautiful brunette was waiting for him there, giving him a smile that was so sympathetic that it made him want to crawl under his desk. He didn't want sympathy—especially not from someone like her. He wanted to impress her and that had been his moment to be her "knight in shining armor." Of course, he had just looked pathetic. Any moment, the kids would go back to talking and his words would be deemed absolutely meaningless.

"Thank you," she said sweetly, eyeing him longer than was comfortable for him.

Her eyes were sight and inviting—he knew that, even though he didn't have the nerve to meet them. "It's no problem. Really, it's my job." His voice was shaky and unconvincing. He pulled at his tie and moved toward his chair, sitting down with a sigh.

"I know … but still. Thanks. It was more than I wanted to do."

Finally, Edward brought his gaze up to meet hers—and regretted it immediately. She was too pretty and, in all honesty, he wasn't used to seeing someone so pretty so close. The brunette was understated and her eyes, while intimidating due to their pretty hue, seemed gentle and understanding. He found himself leaning over his desk—drawn to her like a magnet. He almost laughed at the thought of a magnetic connection. They were polar opposites—at least, Edward _thought _they were. He couldn't imagine having something in common with someone like her.

Or someone like anyone. There always seemed to be a wall between him and the rest of the world. It was built so high—built to last so long—he didn't even know where to begin when it came to taking it down. It didn't matter who he was faced with. He hid away beneath layers and layers of outdated clothing and curled up into his own skin.

"Did—did you need help with anything else?" Edward stuttered out as he pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose with his thumb. Still, he couldn't look at her as much as he wanted to.

"No … no. That's it."

He felt her stare and her hover until finally, he felt her leave. He breathed in the scent of books and periodicals and relaxed in his seat. After a few minutes, his heart returned to its normal rate. The teenagers, thankfully, had gotten bored and left, leaving the pretty brunette all alone in the corner. He stole glances at her—hating himself for doing it as it made him feel increasingly creepy by the second—as he worked. Night began to fall and before he knew it, Alice's voice was booming over the library's speakers, telling guests that they had fifteen more minutes to check out before the library closed at nine o'clock.

_I wonder if she knows how late—_his thoughts came to a halt as he peered over at her corner and found that she was already gone. _All that and I never asked for her name … No. What good would that have even been? I would have just made a fool of myself … I'm just being extra sentimental today. _Tomorrow was Valentine's Day—another day to remind Edward of how alone he was. Usually, being alone all of the time didn't bother him much but, on the holidays, the fact that he was alone seemed to be shoved down his throat. _There needs to be a Single's Day. Or an Introvert's Day? Socially Awkward Introverts with Agoraphobia Day … _Edward smirked at the idea of that as he powered down his computer and cleaned up his workspace. He always put every single thing back where he had found it so the desk looked as if it had been unoccupied for the entire day. He never wanted to bother other or be in others way. So, cleaning up like this was the least he could do.

"Slow day," Jasper commented as he locked up the computer lab and caught up with him.

Edward peered at him for a moment, always surprised when his work "friend" actually wanted to be friendly. _I should give him the benefit of the doubt … maybe he does really want to be friends … _

"I like days like this."

Jasper nodded and gave his friend a grin. "Want to get drinks after this? Alice was going to go out with some friends and I didn't really want to hang around my empty apartment."

Edward nodded as if he also thought the idea of being alone in an apartment was blasphemous. _It's not like that's my usual reality or anything … _As much as Edward wanted a friend one second, he wanted to hide away in his room with a good book the next. Friendships meant socializing and socializing wasn't something that was in his blood.

"I had some work to do at home …"

Jasper gave him a playful hit on the back as he replied. "You've been working all day. Come on, just one drink."

_Drinks … drinks couldn't hurt … could they? _

"I guess one drink is fine."

Edward was itching in his skin as they left. Jasper was ecstatic, not noticing the social anxiety bubbling up next to him. Not being one for spontaneity, Edward could barely breathe as he entered his old 1997 Honda accord and followed Jasper of the parking lot. He drove faster than Edward would have liked, speeding down the street without a care in the world. Truly, he was just going seven over the speed limit, forcing Edward to press down on the gas pedal harder than he had ever done before. _Maybe I can go home and just send him an email … tell him that something came up and I couldn't come … He wouldn't be too mad, would he? _

The radio station moved to a commercial, featuring a couple discussing engagement rings. "Valentine's Day Specials"—that's all he has been hearing about lately. It was on every commercial, television and radio. He couldn't walk into a store without hearing little long songs. As he dealt with the constant reminders, he began to look at the world around him, noticing the happy faces and the laughter. During times like these, he wished he could be normal. _I can't just drive home. I'll hate myself for it. I'm stronger than this. One drink never hurt anyone and I like Jasper. He's nice. He doesn't judge me. Everything is going to be fine. _

Jasper pulled into Blakeslees, a place Edward had passed by many times before but had never been to. He wasn't one for eating out and bars always seemed too loud. He had managed to go to a few in college and hadn't been able to stand the way people acted after a few drinks. Their inhibitions were too low and they were all too friendly and talkative. _Or maybe I'm too shy and judgmental. _He turned the keys in the ignition, turning off the car and killing the radio. _Just breathe. You've got this. _People were trickling into the restaurant from the parking lot, laughing and chatting without a care in the world as Edward sat glued to his driver's seat, trying to breathe and clear the nagging thoughts in his head.

"Hey, man. You ready?" Jasper tapped on Edward's window, scaring him as he pulled him from his nagging contemplations.

Edward jumped in his seat before he flushed, embarrassed by his jitteriness as he unbuckled his seatbelt and slid out of the car to meet Jasper.

"Sorry, man. Didn't mean to scare you."

"It's cool. I'm just … it's cool."

Edward forced a smile, wanting to seem as friendly as possible. He _wanted _to be friendly—he _wanted _to have people to confine in—but he always messed it up. Even if he did something like this one time, he knew he would be back to his old ways by tomorrow. He would convince himself that, deep down, Jasper really only pitied him and then Edward would do what Edward did best: avoid people until they gave up on him. Even if someone did like him, after being ignored so many times, they had to wonder if any sort of relationship would be worth it.

"You been here before?" Jasper asked, making conversation since the other man wasn't offering anything up. "I go here a lot with Alice. Good food and the service is nice."

Edward shook his head, staring at the tan, unassuming building in front of him. "It's always too busy when I drive by."

"It's always busy. That should just tell you that it's good."

Jasper took the lead and moved inside, brushing past a few pairs waiting as he went to put his name in for a booth. The way he chatted so easily made Edward envious. He wished he could walk into a place with that much confidence and talk effortlessly.

"It should just be a minute or two," Jasper explained as he joined Edward, who was hunched over on the bench, as far away from everyone else as possible.

"That's cool."

"_That's cool"? I should try to say something else. What should we talk about … what should we … hmmm …_

"You're a man of few words, Edward," Jasper teased as he sat down beside him.

"Yeah."

Jasper threw his head back and laughed at the quick response, nudging his new friend playfully with his elbow.

"It's cool if you don't like to talk much. What is it that you do like to do? After work, you always go straight home."

"I don't know … I like to read."

"Well, that's good since you work at a library. Read anything good lately?"

"1Q84—it's a dystopian novel."

"I've heard of that one. I think I own it even. Just haven't picked it up yet. Haven't had the time."

"I always have the time." Edward laughed, pulling at the ends of his sleeves with his fingers.

"When you're not reading, what do you do?"

"Whitlock!" the hostess called out.

"That's us." Jasper hopped up and took off after the hostess, leaving Edward to trial behind him.

The hostess placed them in a booth right below a flatscreen. With a football game playing, everyone's eyes were set in their direction. Even though they weren't looking directly at the pair, it still made Edward uncomfortable. Stifling the discomfort, he peered at the menu in front of him.

"Want to get a pitcher?"

"A pitcher?"

"Of beer."

"I know, I know … I just don't drink too much."

"You don't like to?"

"No … I like a beer every now and then. It's just—"

"Then, it's settled," Jasper interrupted, smiling at him. "Come on. Just have a little fun … it's just for one night."

One drink had turned into many. Edward hunched over the table, swaying along to a commercial jingle as he counted the glasses in front of him. There were only three but he was a lightweight. Jasper nursed his third beer as he stared up at the flatscreen, waiting for a call to be made by the referee. Edward burped, flushing at the fact that he was buzzed in public. His eyes darted around the room as he wondered if anyone noticed him. He adjusted his shirt and then ran his hands through his hair—nervous and skittish.

"How you feel?" Jasper asked as he dropped his gaze and looked at him.

"Good. I feel …" Edward trailed off as his eyes found something more interesting.

The energy in the room shifted as she—the brunette from the library—walked in with a friend. Her hair was curled and her usually preppy outfit was switched out for a pretty sweater dress over tights. As hard as he tried, he couldn't stop staring at her. There was a pull between them, tethering them from opposite corners of the room. At least, Edward felt that string between them. He was sure that she didn't. _Shoot. Shoot. Shoot. I must look ridiculous right now. What if she sees me … I'm a mess. _His eyes widened at his thoughts before his shoulders dropped and he snorted, laughing at himself. _God, this is completely ridiculous. Meeting the girl of my dreams in a bar … I'm too buzzed to think straight. _

"What's so funny?" Jasper questioned, smiling at his mess of a friend. Edward shook his head, continuing to laugh to himself. "You don't drink much, do you?"

Edward snorted again, reaching for his glass of water. He took a long drink and then looked at his friend. His eyes were suddenly serious as if he was about to state the most important bit of information in the entire world. He leaned across the table, getting as close to Jasper's face as he could. Jasper leaned back, confused, before he began to laugh, too.

"Oh my god, you're a light weight, Edward. Who would have guessed?" This time, Jasper snorted. "Just kidding. I would have."

"Can I tell you a secret?" Edward whispered as serious as can be.

"Secret? Sure. Shoot."

Edward looked away for a moment, peering over at his crush and her friend as they were walked toward their booth on the other side of the bar.

"There's someone I like …" Edward flushed, staring down at his empty beer glass while wishing he had another. He needed the courage.

"God, you sound like a schoolgirl right now or something."

"What? I'm being serious."

"Okay," Jasper responded, leveling with him. "Who is it? Someone I know?"

"You might recognize her … She comes into the library a lot. And today, I helped her out. She's nice. Pretty. Her voice is nice, too. I can tell she's a good person."

Jasper smiled, staring at Edward for a moment before finishing off his beer. "That's cool. Have you tried asking her out?"

Edward leaned back in his seat, knocking against the cushion and causing the entire booth to rock. The man behind him cursed, causing Edward to quickly apologize before running a nervous hand through his now unkept hair.

"She wouldn't be into me."

"How would you know? You haven't asked her."

"I know. Someone like her … someone like her wouldn't be into someone like me."

"Why not? You're not a bad looking guy. Why would you think she wouldn't want to date you?"

"Well, look at her." Edward gestured across the room without moving his gaze. He didn't want to look her way. If he looked, he wouldn't be able to stop and if he wouldn't be able to stop, he would only embarrass himself.

"Is she here?" Jasper asked, confused.

"Over there," Edward said, pointing in the general direction of which she sat. "She's in the sweater dress. Brown hair. Pale skin. Super pretty."

Jasper looked and Edward sat silently, waiting for his reaction. "You're never going to guess this."

"Guess what?"

"She's staring over here. She's looking at you."

Edward's gaze darted up, looking at Jasper with wide eyes. "No, she isn't."

"Look for yourself."

Edward couldn't bring himself to. Instead, he continued to stare at his new friend in disbelief. Then, his stomach turned as he watched Jasper wave at her.

"What are you doing?" Edward gritted out. "Okay, stop looking. Stop looking. This is so embarrassing."

Edward slurred his words as alcohol mixed with nerves began to grate on him. He tried—he really did—to not look at his crush across the room. He felt stupid and young all of the sudden as his cheeks began to feel as if they were on fire. Every bit of him was fidgety and as he sat there, he wondered if he had ever had this reaction to a girl. Or to absolutely anything ever. It was too much—it was all too much for him. He was breathless and flustered and uncomfortable and, with great effort, he brought himself to look across the room—heart stopping as he found two beautiful chocolate brown eyes staring back. He couldn't see their color perfectly from where he sat but he had looked at her so many times before and had her face etched in his mind. _That's not freaking creepy. Good job, Cullen. Obsessing over a girl you don't even know. _

She smiled when he looked at her, perking up in her seat before she waved at him. Her friend, a taller blonde, laughed at her as his brunette blushed and covered her face with her hand. She dropped her gaze and Edward continued to look—too consumed by alcohol to look away.

"She seems to like you," Jasper pointed out.

"No. She probably doesn't. Maybe she's just … friendly or something."

"Friendly? She was flirting with you, Edward. Have more confidence in yourself."

"I do have confidence," he answered lamely. _Okay, maybe that's a bit of a stretch. _"Some confidence."

"You should go talk to her."

"No!" Edward shot back instantly, feeling his entire body heat up with embarrassment. "No … I can't do that. It's … it's … I can't. I'm not good at just approaching someone."

"I'll go for you. I'll talk you up and then she'll want to come over here. I guarantee it."

"No. You don't have to do that. Just leave it. Please."

"Come on, man. You'll be thanking me."

Jasper slid out of his seat, dead set on going over to the pair when Edward stood up, too. His hands were shaky as he pulled out his wallet and threw a few twenties down on the table. Then, he grabbed his cellphone and opened his app store, meaning to grab an Uber so he wouldn't have to wait to sober up.

"I'm going to head out. I'm really tired all of the sudden."

He was a terrible liar but he was too buzzed and nerve-wrecked to care.

"You're leaving?" Jasper stopped in his tracks, looking remorseful as he turned back to the table. "Sorry, man. I was just messing around. Look, if you don't want me to go over there, I don't have to. I just thought … Never mind, it doesn't matter what I was thinking. It's just, tomorrow's Valentine's Day and I was thinking maybe you could … I don't know. My bad, man."

Jasper sat back down and looked up at Edward expectantly, waiting for him to do the same.

"It's cool," Edward lied, nervous and scatterbrained. "I'm still going to head out. This has been too much excitement for me." A small laugh escaped him and in this moment, he felt almost embarrassed. He hated being like this but he didn't know another way.

"I mean, if you want to go you can go. I thought we were really vibing though. I don't know why you want to rush out of here …"

Jasper was hurt. They had been working together for three years and had barely spoken a word to each other. He had tried to reach out so many times and was always shot down. Never once did he think it was because Edward was a mean or shitty person. Just shy—_painfull_y shy. He had observed him for years and came to a realization: he didn't have anyone to open up to. He had never seen him with a single friend and never heard him talk about any family. Maybe Edward was a secretive person—or maybe he really didn't have anyone. The latter made him sad for the guy. Everyone needed somebody. As much as he wanted to be that "somebody" for Edward, the guy wouldn't let him. Him opening up seemed as improbable as him winning the lottery multiple times. Jasper wanted to say something to convince the man to stay but instead, ended up staying silent as he watched him hustle out of the bar. Then, his eyes moved back to the girl—Edward's crush—and found her staring at the empty space Edward had just occupied.

"Fuck, she likes you too, man," Jasper said to the empty booth across from him before he drank the last few drops of his beer.

**************************************Library Love*******************************************

Valentine's Day: a day filled with happy couples, hearts and flowers, and bags and bags of chocolate. Edward had only experienced the latter. _CVS will definitely have a sale tomorrow and I'll be off work … I can start that new book and gorge on chocolate. That's what I'll do. Happy Valentine's day to me … _The feeling of a figure standing in front of his desk brough him back to reality and he ran a hand through his hair, flustered for zoning out in the middle of work. He was ready to shoot the person an apologetic smile but his eyes widened as he realized who the figure was.

"Hey," the brunette said lamely, smiling at him as she stood there, holding something behind her back.

"Hello." Edward adjusted his bowtie and then his glasses before he managed a "calm" smile in her direction. He couldn't meet her eyes, so instead, he stared past her and hope that she wouldn't notice. "Was there something I could help you with?"

"There is." She smiled, almost mischievous as she stood before him, swaying on her feet. "Do you know what day it is today?"

"February fourteenth," he replied right away.

"And … do you know why that date is so significant?"

She was teasing him. He shifted in his seat and dropped his gaze. _Oh my gosh. Stop being so shy and look up at her. _He gazed upward, still not meeting her eyes, as he answered her.

"It's Valentine's Day?"

"Ding! Ding! Ding!" she giggled before she pulled a card out from behind her back. Then, her confidence transformed into a shy smile almost as if she was questioning whether or not this was a good idea in the first place. "I wanted to give you this?"

"What is it?" he said hesitantly as he peered down at the card and small box of chocolates.

"A Valentine. For you. I thought … Well, I don't know what I was thinking. I was just inspired, I guess."

"Inspired to give me a Valentine?"

She giggled at the surprised look on his face and reached out, handing him the Valentine. When he didn't take it right away, she sat it on his desk and took a step back.

"It's just some chocolates and a corny card. I hope this is all right."

Edward nodded, still reeling with disbelief. "I should have gotten you something …"

She giggled louder now, covering her face with her hand. "How were you supposed to know I was going to get you something?"

Edward shrugged, trying not to smile. If he smiled, he knew his smile would be way too big and there would be no doubt that he liked her.

"Thank you …" he blushed, realizing he didn't know her name.

"Bella," she supplied helpfully without being offended. "Sorry," she backpedaled. "I'm handing you a Valentine and you don't even know who I am."

"Bella … that's pretty. Do you know Bella means beautiful in Italian?"

"I may have heard that once or twice," she teased.

Edward flushed, feeling stupid and awkward. _Why can't I just talk to girls like a normal person? This is so embarrassing. She probably regrets coming up to me. She probably—_

"So, are you calling me beautiful, then?" she flirted, interrupting his thoughts.

"Um, no," he said quickly as he felt his entire body burst into flames. _Shoot. Shoot. Shoot! _"No, I mean, _yes_. I do think you're beautiful. You're more than beautiful. You're gorgeous. I always thought you're so pretty. That's why I'm always looking at you-that's why," Edward stopped his ramblings midsentence. _Holy. Freaking. Shit. _

It was all word vomit. Every thought and feeling he had about her was no on display and he wanted to crawl under his desk and never come out again. _Maybe I should just quit. I've had a good run here. Maybe this is just my time now. _

"You're cute"—she dropped her gaze, reading his name tag—"Edward."

His heart fluttered at the sound of his name falling from her lips. _God, I'm so lame. _She gave him one last smile before she turned on her heel.

"I have an essay to write. It was nice talking to you, Edward."

He could listen to her say his name for the rest of his life. It sounded like windchimes as it fell from her plump lips. His arms ached to hold her and his mouth yearned to say everything that he held inside. Instead of doing what he desired, he sat in his office chair and stared down at the card and box of chocolates in disbelief. After a few minutes, and after he was sure no one was watching him, he opened the card and read its contents.

**To: the sexy librarian who always captures my attention**

**From: the shy brunette in the corner**

**Hey, it's me, Bella. You don't know me and we've only spoken once, but I really wanted to give you this. You're always so wide-eyed and unsure of yourself and I just wanted you to know that I think you're cute. I like your glasses and your sweater vests and the way you always stumble over your words. I like that you're so thoughtful and always look like you're thinking about something super deep. I like the way your brows furrow when you're contemplating something and how nervous you get when you have to open up. Your ears get all flushed—bright red—and I always wondered if you knew that. **

**Anyway, if you want, I'd love for you to have dinner with me tonight. It's Valentine's Day and I would like if you were my Valentine. Sorry this is so bold. If this doesn't work out, I could always just switch libraries. Truthfully, there's a library right by my house and I've only been coming to this one because of you. (Sorry if that's weird. I've always just liked the way you looked at me. You make me feel special.). **

**At the risk of sounding like a kid, if you want to, fill out the paper I slipped in the envelope. You won't hurt my feelings too bad if you say no. I'll like you no matter what, sexy librarian who doesn't know he's sexy. **

Edward read the letter three time—every time wondering if he had suddenly become illiterate. The words weren't making sense and his mind just couldn't seem to compute them. _There's no way someone like her can like someone like me like this. There's just no way … _

Shaky fingers dug into the envelope and found a tiny piece of paper. On it said, "do you want to be my Valentine?" with a box for yes and a box for no. His heart was racing as he took a pen and quickly checked "yes." Then, he stared back at the card in disbelief. _She likes me … she really likes me … I can't wait to tell Jasper. He's going to flip. _

Hesitantly, with his heart racing, Edward stood from his chair and moved away from his desk. He could barely breathe let alone think as he held the paper with a shaky hand and moved toward where Bella sat. She could feel him coming and had a small smirk painted on her lips. Her eyes didn't move away from her book as she waited for him. As he approached, he tried to calm himself down. Never had a woman approached him like this. He had never flirted in his entire life—had never been on a date. He had had his crushes in the past but they had all led to nothing. Unsure of himself and lacking confidence, he had never been able to find the right words to express his feelings. Thankfully, Bella was confident enough for them both, speaking out when he wanted to stay silent.

When he reached her desk, he stood there for a moment, shifting on his feet as he waited for her to look up. He cleared his throat, feeling his face burning up as he met her gaze. She smiled as she peered up at him, looking coy as she straightened her back and blushed.

"Here you go," he said quietly as he set the paper down on her desk.

Instantly, he turned away, not wanting to be there as she read his response. He was too nervous and far too unsure of himself. He listened as he set down her book and continued toward his desk and she reached for the paper.

"How about tonight around eight?" he heard her say.

_Tonight at eight … I have a date tonight at eight … a date … I have a date … I, Edward Cullen, have a date! _

After taking a long, deep breath, he turned around to face her. Her pale skin was flushed and she bit down on her lip as she suppressed a coy grin.

"Eight o'clock. Eight o'clock is good," he said as if he had some experience in the dating arena.

Of course, Bella saw straight through this. She didn't know how much experience Edward had, but she knew it couldn't be much. As sexy as he was, he was also incredibly awkward. It was endearing. She was used to dating jocks and assholes. In the past, she always dated men who had let her down. While Edward wasn't her typical type, he was better than anyone she had ever seen. Something about his dorkiness pulled at her heartstrings and while he was quieter than she would have wanted—being quiet herself, it was good to be in a relationship with someone who was outgoing—she could force herself out of her comfort zone if it meant being with someone like him.

"You're blushing," she pointed out as if she wasn't pink, too.

"Sorry." He dropped his gaze, staring down at his perfectly polished shoes. "Girls like you make me nervous."

"Girls like me?"

"Sorry."

"Stop apologizing." She giggled. "What do you mean, girls like me?"

"You're pretty. I'm sure you know that already, though."

Her blush deepened. _I definitely picked the right guy_, she thought to herself. "Want to get Italian food?"

"Italian … You know any good spots?"

"Where do you usually go?"

"I don't usually go anywhere."

"What do you mean?"

"I eat at home a lot."

"You never go out with friends? I saw you out the other night."

"Jasper? We work together. I guess I could consider him a friend … That was our first time hanging out. I usually keep to myself. And I'm a good cook so I don't see the point of going out."

"You should invite me over and cook for me sometime, then."

He smiled at this, too excited than he felt that he should have been as he pictured it.

"Yeah, maybe."

"Maybe?"

"I … mean … yeah, I don't know … sure … if you want …" he awkwardly rambled out.

"I'm teasing you, Edward. How about we go to Bella Italia? I go there with my friend Rosalie all of the time. I think you'll like it."

"Bella Italia … I'll call and make a reservation, then. That's what you usually do, right? Make a reservation?"

"Can I ask you something?" she said suddenly, turning in her seat to face him.

"Shoot."

"Don't take this the wrong way … but I'm too curious not to ask … Have you ever been on a date before, Edward?"

"A date? I mean, I went on a group date once. Well, I guess it wasn't really a group date. There wasn't a girl there for me or anything. There _were _girls there, though. A few of them, in fact." Bella was smiling at him so hard that he stopped talking for a moment. "Sorry, I'm going to have to learn to stop rambling."

"I like your ramblings …"

"I guess I've never been on a real date before." Edward cringed as he said this and dropped his gaze. "Sorry, I sound so lame."

"Like I said before, stop apologizing. I'm honored to be your first."

"My first?" Edward's face was bright red as his thoughts went somewhere that embarrassed him.

"Your first date," she clarified with a smirk.

"Oh—right, right. Okay, I'll make the reservation, then."

Awkwardly, he went back to his desk and pulled up the website, searching for a number. Quiet and embarrassed, he called the restaurant and made the reservation in such a fashion that the hostess wondered if he had ever had a conversation with another human being before. He fumbled through the conversation but felt exhilarated when he was done. They had a table for two at eight o'clock. Despite everything, he was proud of himself and before he knew it, he was leaving his desk and venturing toward the computer lab. He had to tell Jasper the good news.

Ignoring the "no talking, please," signs around the room, he leaned over Jasper's desk and spoke in hushed tones. Jasper was surprised—Edward had never reached out to him and he was _never _the one to just strike up a conversation.

"We have a date tonight at eight," Edward finished after he had quickly spewed the whole story.

"Congrats, man," Jasper whispered back with a smile plastered on his face. "I can't believe it. That's so freaking awesome."

"I know. I can't believe it either. I hope she's not just playing around with my feelings. I hope she actually shows up."

"She will. She doesn't seem like the type of girl to do that. After you left last night, she kept staring over at my booth like she was hoping that you would reappear. I think she likes you a lot more than you give her credit for."

"Maybe … it just all seems too good to be true, though."

"I felt the same way when I started dating Alice."

One of the kids in shushed them as he glared at them over his computer monitor.

"We should probably stop talking." Jasper grabbed a piece of scrap paper and quickly jotted down his number. "Here's my cell number in case you don't already have it."

Edward had all the employees' numbers programmed in his phone in case of emergencies, but he had never considered contacting anyone until now.

"Thanks. I'll text you to let you know how it goes."

"You'll do great, man."

Edward wasn't sure if he believed him, but he hoped.

***********************************Library Love***********************************************

This was the third outfit he had tried on and still, he had no self-confidence. All of his clothes looked the same and no matter what combination he picked, he looked extremely dorky. He adjusted his glasses, pulled at his sweater vest, played with his bowtie before he decided that this was as good as it's going to get. _If she likes me, she must like the way I dress already. I can't go out and buy new clothes just for the occasion. _His eyes darted to the clock on his wall and found it was a little past seven.

"You look good, Cullen," he said to his reflection, realizing how cringy he was being.

He fixed his hair one last time before grabbing his wallet. He had agreed to pick her up at her place and they would drive to the restaurant together. Since agreeing to this, he had tried his best to create the perfect Spotify playlist for the short ride over. He wanted to impress her with his taste in music but also wanted something mellow to start off the evening with. After scrolling through countless songs, he had made a playlist comprising of Iron & Wine, Bon Iver, and St. Vincent. Tonight had to be perfect. He liked her too much for it to go any other way. With no experience, he didn't know what sort of expectations to have. So, he decided to have none. He would put himself out there, wearing his heart on his sleeve, as he hoped for the best.

The sun was falling as he slid into his Honda Civic, creating the perfect mood during the twilight of the day. Still, he couldn't believe he had a date on Valentine's day. For a moment, he felt almost normal. Usually a hermit, all of this was foreign to him. He still couldn't wrap his mind around it.

Holocene trickled through his speakers on his way to her apartment. The music calmed him, making him feel hopeful. _Tonight will go well—it has to. This is only the beginning. At least, I hope this is the beginning of something incredible. I need something incredible. After years of comfortable mediocrity, I deserve something new. _

She was waiting outside for him as he pulled up. It was surprisingly warm tonight and she wore a pretty heart pattern dress over red tights paired with a jean jacket and Mary Janes. Edward couldn't help but stare as he rolled up beside her and stopped the car. In his eyes, she had never looked so beautiful—so innocent yet so sexy. He put the car in park and nervously stepped out, rushing to open the passenger door for her.

"Hey," he said lamely.

"Hey," she replied with a smile as she slid into the passenger seat and rested her purse on her lap.

_This is happening … This is really happening! _his mind shouted as he got back into the driver's seat and put the car in drive.

"Bon Iver," she commented as she listened to the music. "I love this band. I've always wanted to see them live."

"Me, too," he replied as he pulled out of her apartment complex. "I've never been to a concert."

"You've never done a lot of things … I guess I'm going to be your first for tons of stuff," she teased him.

"I guess so."

He wanted her to be his first everything—she was that special. His body felt warm beside her and everything fiber of him tingled. So many years had passed without a single feeling like this and now he was feeling everything. So much so that his heart felt like it was going to explode.

The restaurant was packed and while he was usually afraid of crowds, he felt a little more confident by her side. Of course, his fear wasn't gone completely—he still felt on edge for most of the night. Thankfully, he could focus on her. Her beauty, her sweet voice, and her kindness toward him made him forget about the mass of people for a while. She was so confident and so sure of herself. In many ways, he was everything he wanted to be. Together, she filled in all the gaps in his personality. She was strong in every area he lacked.

"I can't believe you're a writer, too," Bella said after Edward told her all about his sci-fi series.

"Not much of a writer. I'd be too afraid to ever publish anything."

"Why? The story you described sounds incredible."

"Maybe … I'd be too afraid to hear people's responses, though. I guess I just really fear criticism."

"That's fair. Although, every book gets criticized. Even the classics. Some of my absolutely favorite books have the most horrid reviews. You shouldn't let that fear stop you. Then, you're denying all of the people who could have loved your work the chance to read it."

Edward flushed, looking down at the napkin in his lap.

"What is it?" Bella asked when she saw his expression.

"Nothing …"

"Come on, tell me." She was quiet for a moment, before she added. "Your ears are all red now … you must want to open up."

"What do you mean?"

"Whenever you want to tell me something, it seems like your ears get red. Or when you look at me for too long … it's like you blush all over your body."

His cheeks became even more red and he finally opened up and said, "I don't know … I feel really comfortable around you. I've never felt this way before. For instance, I usually hate going out but around you … God, this is going to sound cheesy."

"What is it?"

He tore off a bit of the bread in front of him, shoving it in his mouth as he tried to calm his nerves. Bella giggled at this causing him to smile too as he chewed on the bread. Then, he took a sip of his wine—something he wasn't used to drinking much of. Bella took a sip of hers too as she watched him with a curious, hopeful expression.

"I feel like I can do anything when I'm with you," Edward finally said, unable to look at her.

"I'm glad," she responded after a few moments of looking at him. "Because I really like you."

"You do?"

"Probably more than I should. I should be focusing on writing right now but … it seems like all I've been able to focus on is you. That's why I've been going to your library every day. It's a bit of a drive for me but I can't stay away. I mean, you drove thirty minutes to get to my house tonight. I make that thirty-minute drive every day just to get to you. I have a library literally five minutes away from my apartment complex. You just … you drew me in."

"How could someone like me draw someone like you in?" he asked in disbelief.

"Your cuteness." She laughed before she took another sip of her wine. She was being bolder tonight than she had ever been before.

"My cuteness? I've never thought of myself as cute …"

"You're extremely cute," she stated as the waitress interrupted them and sat down their entrees.

"You're extremely cute, too," Edward responded in barely over a whisper.

They chatted as they ate and there was never an awkward moment between them. When they weren't talking, they were stealing looks and after they ate, Edward suggested that they walked around a bit. Hand and hand, they walked down the sidewalk until Edward paused in front of a convince store selling cheap bouquets. He could kick himself—she had gotten him chocolates and he had been too inexperienced to get her a single thing.

"Wait right here," he said quickly as he left her on the sidewalk and darted inside.

He grabbed the nicest bouquet of roses—as nice as a bouquet could be at a convince store—and quickly checked out. She smiled at him as she watched him come out of the automatic doors frazzled with a bouquet of flowers in hand.

"Baby, you shouldn't have," she teased.

His eyes widened as she said "baby" and he nearly tripped as he tried to grasp how much he liked hearing that word come from her. No one had ever called him "baby" before and he couldn't wish for something better. He smiled, feeling young and embarrassed as he handed over the bouquet of flowers. He was always nervous giving gifts, remembering the times he had tried to give flowers and little pictures to his mother and she had shooed him away. Bella was different, however—she accepted the gift with open arms.

"I hope these are all right," Edward said shyly.

"They're more than all right. They're perfect." She paused for a moment, staring at his features that were highlighted by the streetlights. "I want to try something, if that's okay."

"What is it?"

"Close your eyes."

He blinked, surprised as his heart rate began to pick up. He thought he knew where she was heading with this but he didn't want to be too hopeful. After a few moments, he closed his eyes and waited for her to make a move. Her breath tickled his face and he sucked in a mouthful of cold air before he choked on an exhale, too nervous to focus.

"Relax," she whispered. He could hear how close she was and it made him shiver. "Just relax a bit."

He listened to her, letting his shoulder dropped as she leaned forward. Even though his eyes were closed, he could feel how close her mouth was to his. She must have been on her tip-toes as she tried to reach him. The first kiss was chaste and gentle but against his eyelids, he saw fireworks. His entire body felt like it was waking up for the first time. She pulled away, gave him a moment, and then pressed her mouth against his again. This time, her lips were teasing, pushing him far but never too far. Eventually, he opened up to her, opening his mouth up just enough for her to slip her tongue inside. She teased him for a moment, making him feel intoxicated before she pulled away.

She was smiling softly at him as he opened his eyes. Then, she seemed shy all of the sudden, playing with the flowers in her hands as she tried to calm her breathing. This felt like something brand-new to both of them. Even though she was more experienced, Edward was different than anything she had ever known. Suddenly, the future was exciting and filled with more possibilities than she felt ready for. Still, she would become ready. She would become anything for him and it seemed that he would become anything for her, too. A small crush could transform into so much.

As they walked back to the car, Edward couldn't contain his excitement. He had to tell someone. Tonight, not only did he have a date, he had his very first kiss. Very first real, amazing, spectacular kiss. He reached for his phone and quickly texted Jasper.

_**She's so much more than I expected. Everything went perfectly. This really feels like the start of something new. **_

__And it was. Hand and hand, they ventured into uncharted waters together. Together they would grow, transforming into the people they always wanted to be. Even after they became official, Bella still came to the library under the guise of being a stranger. She would ask him for help and book recommendations and he would play along for her, fulfilling her dream of a sexy librarian perfectly. They'd still kisses in the aisles surrounded by the thing they both loved most—books. He'd still flush when she would do something too shameless, like pinching his butt as he reached for a book on the top shelf for her. She would study at her normal table until the library closed and then they would have dinner, discussing writing, books, and friends. Now, Edward had friends and he couldn't believe it. He was opening up in a way he had never imagined possible.

One night, they had met Alice and Jasper at Blakeslees and Jasper had embarrassed him, telling Bella all about the night many months ago when Edward had revealed his crush to him.

"You should have seen his face—bright red."

"I know that face." Bella laughed, cuddling up next to her boyfriend on the booth. "He blushes all the time. You think after everything we've done together, he'd be less shy."

"I don't blush all the time," he argued, playfully seeming miffed.

"You're right, baby," she replied before kissing his cheek.

"Look at that. He's blushing right now," Alice pointed out as she giggled at her boyfriend's best friend.

As Edward leaned against his girlfriend, surrounded by friends, he couldn't believe how far he had come. And it had all came down to a little Valentine by a girl he had filled his mind for so long. Even now, he still had that piece of paper in his wallet that said check "yes" or "no." He would have it when he proposed to her. He would have it when they got married. He would show it to people at his reception as his best man and best friend, Jasper, teased him about it. He would have it when they had their first child. And their second. And their third. He would show it to his grandchildren and they would tease him for being so cheesy. It would always be tucked away in his wallet behind a small photo of her—the woman who had changed his life.


End file.
